Role Models

A co-worker and I were just discussing the Batman tv series and I mentioned that I would watch it when I was a little girl (as re-runs) and wait to see Batgirl ride across on her motorcycle. I loved those episodes that she was in. Not realizing that I was looking for a strong feminine role model, I just thought she was cool. But that got me to thinking of all of the role models that I had when I was growing up in the 70s and 80s.

Not only was there Batgirl, there were other strong women. Not just in regular tv shows but in cartoons as well. Wonderwoman, Charlie's Angels, Josie and the Pussycats, Daphne & Velma from Scooby Doo are just a few.

So, what did I learn. Well, I learned that it was ok to have an opinion and that I was just as good as the boys (if not better/smarter in some cases). I think I also learned that a pretty face goes a long way when it comes to men. I also learned that what was inside counted, but that the pretty girl got the attention while the frumpy librarian was usually ignored. Oh, and it was ok to be bad as long as you looked good doing it.

Also, it mattered what you wore. If you wore things that were in style you would be recognized more than if you wore just regular clothes. Examples are Daphne in Scooby Doo (she always got kidnapped), Batgirl compared to her secret identity of Barbara Gordon and Wonderwoman and whatever her secret identity was. I think also as the 70s went on the clothes got skimpier. I think that was something when I was in my twenties that I unconciously remembered.

Overall I am not so sure that these women did me any favors. Sure they paved the way for women to be more than just nurses and waitresses and secretaries. The idea was that a woman could be and do whatever she wanted to be and do. But I think it also was portrayed a little trashy. Regular housewives were still portrayed as the good girls but they were usually frumpy and lived boring lives. Where the stronger more opinionated women lived interesting exciting lives. I look back and I like what was accomplished in the change of how women were viewed, but I think it did a diservice to the stay at home moms and housewives. I think women were told that if you wanted to have a say or have an interesting life then you needed to give up being a homemaker, wife and mother. Of course those women also made life look easy and to be honest not much reality entered the picture.

I find it fascinating to look back at those 70s women and think of all that was accomplished and all that was taken away. We gained more individuality and more of a role in society but I think we lost part of our identity as women, a softness. Gradually I think we have regained some of that, but I still think we are judged by that standard. Look at Hillary Clinton during her campaign in Massachusetts. She welled up with emotion and showed a softer side and was basically torn to shreds because of it. Why? Because a strong woman is not expected to have a softer side and show feelings - it's a weakness. I'm not her biggest fan, but I have to say it endeared her to me more than any hardened speech would have. No one is perfect and I like when regular human nature shows us that.

Going back to the shows that I grew up on. They were a mix. Getting away from the traditional way women were thought about to more of an equal rights mentality. I think in some cases we did more harm than good. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the benefits that previous generations have worked so hard for. But I have to say that it would be nice to have a door held for me or a seat given up once in awhile. But would I exchange that for all that has been accomplished? Probably not.

Smoking

First let me begin with I have never smoked. I never thought it was a good idea and found it to be disgusting actually. I didn't like the smell and seeing the filters at the end covered in this brown stuff was gross. Both of my parents smoked since they were teens. My Dad especially had yellowish brown fingers where he had held his cigarettes for years. So to make a long story short - didn't like so didn't do.

Now over the years I have been a small advocate for non-smoking. I won't allow smoking in my car or my house - I have to breathe there so I should be in control. However, in public places I have always considered both sides. It has always been my thought that each individual no matter what the cause has a right to make up there own mind. I will share my side and I must admit debate and bring up reasons why they should be swayed to my side, but I don't force my opinions on other people. Since I don't smoke I would sit in non-smoking sections, I would often avoid places that were mostly smokers. If I was driving in a smokers car then I would ask to have my window down.

Now having said all that I must admit that a non-smoking world is quite attractive. I would enjoy not walking into smoke filled areas or smelling it on the clothes of smokers. Not to mention the equality of not having people take smoke breaks all the time while I am still working. BUT, I have to say some of these new laws and rules seem very over the top.

The building that I work in sends out memos regarding where smokers can and can not smoke. They regulate it because the smokers were standing in front of the building and when you walked in there was smoke everywhere. I thought that was fine, appearances and all. Plus to be honest it benefited me. I understand the no smoking in the parking garage because of all the fumes. But yesterday they sent out a memo stating that smokers were not allowed to smoke on or around the benches in the front of the building, that there was a designated area for them off to the side of the front of the building. They want them clustered in front and upside of the building but off to the side. Wouldn't it make more sense to get them further from the building where the smoke could go up and not hover. Why can't the smokers have a place to sit down and talk - why do non smokers have extra privileges. It seems so dictatorshippy (I know it's not a real word). Smokers have a lot of sanctions against them and seem to be just letting them take over. I hear loud and clear all of the non smokers complain - but rarely hear a smoker complain. Ok, I know it is an unhealthy habit, I know it is bad for them, I know the risks to other people. BUT, I also know that this is America and everyone should have equality. I mean a McDonald's double cheeseburger isn't healthy either but I don't see anyone grouping those people and putting them in a corner. Personal Responsibility people - not to mention that just because some people complain about something doesn't mean that you have to stop thinking and take away other peoples rights. I see this whole thing getting out of hand. Once you restrict one section, then who is next? Cheeseburger eaters, nose pickers, people who snore, people who chew gum, people who listen to music at work, people who wear crosses. At some point this is going to go to far. We need to stop being so sensitive and stop thinking that we are the beginning and end. There are other people in this world who are just as important as we are and should have the same rights and same consideration as we think we should have as individuals.

I'm not saying there shouldn't be rules that benefit the opposition. Yes the smokers shouldn't be right in front of the building, but forcing them to stand the whole time seems wrong. Don't let them get comfortable and they may stop. NOT! Have you ever met a smoker, they are killing themselves slowly with poison, taking a bench away is not going to stop them. They are a very resilient group. Yes designate smoking areas, but let's not punish someone for a bad habit.